An open letter to true friends

To every true friend I’ve ever had and therefore still have, this one is for you. You know who you are. I can be pretty awful with words, so don’t judge me for that. This might be cheesy, on insipid, or boring. But I can say I can also be pretty good with luck, and this is what I am thankful for.

Sure, shit happens every day. Overall, here in the warmth of the West, we are a bunch of very lucky motherfuckers. We have water in our faucets, electricity in our sockets, warmth in our homes, when the boiler doesn’t let you down. We have meals so rich we are afraid to get fat, and we care about our shape and weight, while many don’t have that luxury; we should kiss the floor we put our feet on every morning, although waking up to go to work can feel so awful. It’s not, it’s a blessing.

Still, in our laborious little brains, in our hearts that fight to be strong, shit still happens. Of course it does. Plans fail, people leave your path, other people leave this world altogether. Tragedies happen, families are destroyed, in spite of hot water and electricity and comforts; hearts are still broken, people still grieve. It’s life, in all its beauty and its corruption. And when shit happens, who do you turn to? Who do you call in the middle of the night, who do you text to see coming to your rescue one minute later? Who do you think about when you need to fill that hole in your stomach? If you have a name or a handful of those in mind, hold onto it with all your strength.

I am hoping you thought of someone who made you feel safe. I am hoping you thought of someone who made you feel grateful, so grateful your heart could explode. Like I am now as I am typing these words, half tipsy because some shit happened to me today. As we said, it happens. At the end of a long, tough day, while surely not as tough as others’, there is just one thing I know: I have no idea what I would ever do without my true friends.

Again, you know who you are. You are the ones I call when things get rough, as well as when they get easy, because that’s one victory I want to share with you. You are the ones I grieve with, cry with, laugh the hardest with. You are the ones I hug the hardest, as well. The ones who are there when the world goes to shit, with a glass of wine in hand as we tell each other to stay strong. And I am thankful for that glass of wine, and the opportunity to look at everything from a safe spot. You are the ones who built my safe spot. You made it with your hands and your sweat and your affection, and it cannot be broken. Time doesn’t matter, relationship doesn’t matter. A true friend can be there from day one or 24 hours. It can be a friend, a boyfriend, a family member, or any kind of tie. What matters is inside, in the secrets of the darkness when you tell each other the things that are heavy in the sunlight. What matters is that hand held tight, even for one second, just to say “I am here, and I won’t let go”. What matters are the confessions, the acts with no reward, and mixtapes made for one another. What matters is who is there when they are not needed, but mostly when they are, indeed, needed.

Dear true friend, if you are still reading, just know that you are the most beautiful thing. There might be days (and there will be more) in which you feel like there is no safety net. There might be days in which you feel there are no friends in the world to help you out, because that’s how the human psyche works. One thing goes wrong and all around you looks dark. Just know that it’s just a trick of the mind, and that, if you are a true friend of mine, this means I am here for you when the night comes. Just like every time you have been there for me, be it one or three hundred, I do not forget.

Overall, all I really wanted to say is thank you. All I really wanted to do is celebrate my enormous luck. Never change and never feel bad about yourself, because, if you lead me to write this down, this means the world. To me, and, I am sure, to others who matter. Dear friend, keep loving hard, and keep being the same person who built up that safe spot we find such happiness in. If there is one thing that counts no matter what, is the smiles when there is nothing to smile about, the tears when there is nothing to cry about, that glass of wine, that naked bath in the middle of the night, praying nobody sees us. It’s those rainy afternoons spent talking about how things were 10 years ago when we still used motorbikes, it’s dancing until the sun comes up. It’s a bottle opener when I really need a beer. It’s that feeling you get when you realize you have found someone who’s worth telling the naked truth to while you don’t really know why.

Dear true friend, thank you for being here. Because if I am feeling alright today, it’s because you made me strong. Do not ever change, and call me whenever you need me. I’ll be there.





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